Jingshen Journey

Finding the Path of the Pain Free Spirit

Jingshen Journey

The Mirror Theory

Several years ago, God gave me a Mirror Theory.

“You draw that which you reflect. You reflect that which you are.”


Trust me when I tell you that this was a hard pill to swallow. First of all, the first part.

“You draw that which you reflect.”

I immediately began to think about people who have been in my life, especially, the type of men that have run after me; that have abused me in some way, and that have been part of my life. My immediate thought was…YUCK!

The first person that popped up in my mind was my ex-husband. “Oh dear God, was I really that bad?”

I mean think about it. Think about every person that has tried – for whatever reason, to be in your energy field for more than just a fleeting moment. Then think about how they treated you – and what you tolerated from them. What did their behavior towards you, tell you about them as a person? Now, apply that thought to yourself. After all, you drew them. Awful isn’t it?

A Matter of Fate?

People always wonder why certain things happen to them. When you question this on that level, just remember what I’m telling you now. It’s not going to be a popular discussion.

I mean, who wants to see, let alone believe the worst about themselves? And more importantly, who wants to think for even one minute – that the trouble a certain individual brought into their lives was somehow related to who they are as a person; and is not totally the other person’s fault? Who wants to be told that they brought this trouble or problem upon themselves?

Ooooh! Yeah….no one likes THAT thought.

School of Life

If life is a journey of lessons to be learned….that is one tough subject.

You see, my ex-husband (may he rest in peace) was a habitual liar and very manipulative. So I had to now examine myself to see if I was exuding the same bad traits because, after all; there was something about me that drew him to me. These character traits have nothing to do with outer packaging, other than simply a framework for your presentation of yourself. Ouch.

So at the time that God gave me this…it was like a slap in the face…literally.

And then the second half…

“You reflect that which you are.”

Now mind you, I received this “Theory,” years ago. I’ve cleaned up my act somewhat since then, but that’s not to say that I’m not still under construction. I’m not perfect, but I’m in the process of being perfected in my spirit. It’s just to say that the quality of the people I draw to me now is considerably better.

Have you checked your reflection?

Under Construction – renovations.

Beholding As In A Glass

2Co 3:18 But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord. KJV

This verse has always puzzled me somewhat, so I looked at several versions of this text to get a clearer meaning.

The NLT (New Living Translation) replaces “open face” with “veil removed;” and “beholding as in a glass” with “can see and reflect.”

The NASB (New American Standard Bible) replaces “open face” with “unveiled face” and “beholding as in a glass” with “beholding as in a mirror.”

The RSV (Revised Standard Version) also  replaces “open face” with “unveiled face” and “beholding as in a glass” with just “beholding.”

These were the major differences I saw for this part of this verse.

It’s Not About Vanity

There is a lot of conversations online about this “veil” and references to Moses coming down the mountain, and having to cover his face to prevent the Israelites from seeing that this glory was fading because he was no longer in the continual presence of God.

I really don’t know how logical that is. It sounds rather vain, if that was the case. I mean obviously, it was going to fade eventually. It might be more logical to believe that the radiance of the glory on him, was just too bright for human eyes, and that might have been the reason.

They briefly mention it in reference to representing the law as being temporal…and that temporal glory fading away as a greater glory, grace through Jesus Christ is revealed.


But then I think about this…

1Co 13:12 For now, we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.


dark’-li: The word occurs in 1Co 13:12, “For now we see in a mirror, darkly,” in the translation of the words en ainigmati, the Revised Version, margin “in a riddle.” The contrast is with the “face to face” vision of Divine things in eternity. Earth’s best knowledge is partial, obscure, enigmatic, a broken reflection of the complete truth

This is another verse that has had me puzzled for a long time. I could never comprehend what seeing in a mirror “darkly” meant. Is there insufficient light? Is the mirror covered? Why is the vision of this mirror, the mirror itself, or even the vision of oneself in the mirror dark?


Then, I think about the veil being rent when Christ was crucified. I even think about Lot, whose name means “veil,” and the problem he had with vision – in his inability to see the better choice when the decision on which way to go came up between him and Abraham.

This seems to be the key with the veils. They represent impaired sight, or vision lacking foresight. There is a lack of discernment attached.


I believe that the law was not given by God to Moses without foresight or discernment. Quite the contrary. It fulfilled its purpose as a foreshadowing of what was coming.

However, God did not present that law with any veil to cover his glory. All he told Moses, was that He could only allow him to see Him from behind because His glory was far greater than Moses’ humanity could behold. (I’ll get back to this word in a minute)

If Moses had to view God from “behind” in order to receive the law; then obviously, something was wrong with his sight. It was as if he had cataracts on his eyes, and even then, God’s glory was too much for him. The cataracts of sin still put him in a place where he could only view that which was behind, and he was unable to experience the fullness of the vision.

He was unable, even with the law in his hands, to see the fullness of God. Likewise, the law does not represent the fullness of God. Grace does.


Yet, when Moses presented this same law to the Israelites, he covered his face with a veil. I believe (jmo) it symbolized the fact that the law falls short of the glory of God, which was still on his face. It shows that it was temporal; and it shows the lack of discernment and vision of humanity, in that it requires a set of rules to govern it, as opposed to operating with grace, which is in the spirit, and is the true humility of humanity.

In other words, the law that Moses gave with the veil covering his face represented the blindness of the people, that would require the law itself.

Seeing through a glass darkly also represents blindness or impaired vision. If our (spiritual) vision was not impaired by our blind humanity, we could see “through” the mirror to the other side, because after all…it’s supposed to be a reflection. If the mirror was clear, we could see all, and as the verse says, “but then shall I know even as also I am known.”


It’s like when Alice went through the looking glass. It was a dimensional portal, but her vision changed prior to her being able to see and move through that portal. Prior to that change, she was seeing through the mirror darkly; ie: only seeing her reflection, but not truly seeing through the mirror into the spiritual realm.

They can see us. We can’t see them. We only now “know in part,” but we don’t know the whole. This is why the world is upside down and everything that is backward is popular. Because our vision is impaired.

However, those of us that are truly in Christ; and not just claiming the name; we are “open-faced.” We are “unveiled.” Why? Because when we accepted Christ, the veil, for us, was rent. Our eyes became opened.


2Co 3:18 So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image. NLT

Max Lucado, in God’s Mirror, states it this way…

2Co 3:18 “And we, with our unveiled faces, reflecting like mirrors the brightness of the Lord, all grow brighter and brighter as we are turned into the image that we reflect; This is the work of the Lord, who is Spirit.”

Reflect God’s Glory

Let’s go back to Moses for a minute.

2 Cor 3:7 The old way, with laws etched in stone, led to death, though it began with such glory that the people of Israel could not bear to look at Moses’ face. For his face shone with the glory of God, even though the brightness was already fading away. NLT

First let me say…there’s a hardness to that. The law etched in stone, denotes hardness (of heart – ie: a stone, cold heart); and is, perhaps one of the reasons that the law fails in light of eternity.


But with regards to the glory of the Lord that shone on Moses, Max Lucado says…

“The Brightness he saw was the brightness he became. Beholding led to becoming. Becoming led to reflecting.” God’s Mirror

Beholding implies contemplation and refraction; serious pondering. I always wondered what the full implications of that word behold was. I knew it meant to see, but that seems a very light-weight definition for a word just dripping with depth. So naturally, I looked it up.

Synonyms are: regard, gaze upon, view; watch; discern.

Verb (often used in the imperative to draw attention to something, archaic or literary) -holds, -holding, -held
1. to look (at); observe

Verb (used with object), beheld, beholding.
1. to observe; look at; see.

1. look; see:

“hold, keep,
“beholden (adj.)
“under obligation, obliged, bound in gratitude,”


This indicates that to “behold” something is not just to see it, but to look at, or gaze upon it with regard. It involves an obligation to watch (which indicates ongoing observation), and to discern or contemplate what you see; to hold on to, or keep that information close.

Now, back to what originally drew me back to reflection on the Mirror Theory in the first place.

Exo 20:7 “You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain, for the LORD will not hold guiltless anyone who takes his name in vain. NET (New English Translation)

So again, I went to Dictionary.com for meanings on the word “vain.”

  1. excessively proud of or concerned about one’s own appearance, qualities, achievements, etc.; conceited: a vain dandy.
  2. proceeding from or showing pride in or concern about one’s appearance, qualities, etc.; resulting from or displaying vanity: He made some vain remarks about his accomplishments.
  3. ineffectual or unsuccessful; futile: vain hopes; a vain effort; a vain war.
  4. without real significance, value, or importance; baseless or worthless: vain pageantry; vain display.
  5. Archaic. senseless or foolish.

The first two definitions reflects the vanity of mankind towards itself. It was the last three definitions that rang true for this verse.


“We exist to give honor to His name.” Max Lucado, God’s Mirror

The world is sending an SOS. Most people aren’t even conscious that they are sending out this message, but they are reflecting a need to be saved. They want to be saved from the culture, from their pain, from their situations, from their struggles, from…themselves.

The interesting thing is…SOS is in Morse code: 3 short, 3 long, 3 short. Its a call for rescue.

In looking at the word origin, I found out that these letters were chosen as the simplest to transmit and receive in Morse code; by folk etymology, taken to be an abbreviation for save our souls.

Isn’t it funny that the 333 that is used in Morse code for an SOS, also represents Christ. His ministry was 3 years in length, to give his message to the world, and then He died, at 33 years of age.


2Co 5:20 Therefore we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making His plea through us. We plead with you on Christ’s behalf, “Be reconciled to God!” NET

“The Ambassador has a singular aim – to Represent his King!” Max Lucado, God’s Mirror

And if the Ambassador properly completes this mission, he is greeted with…

Mat 25:23 His master said to him, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little; I will set you over much. Enter into the joy of your master.’ ESV

Are you positioned to receive that message? What are you reflecting?


http://blueletterbible.org for all scripture verses
http://dictionary.com for definitions.

Forgiving Yourself – Forfeiting Your Pain

Ease ;your subconscious mind - make a peace offering.

I did something years ago that I feel terrible about. I know I’m not a bad person, but it won’t stop attacking my mind. How do I forgive myself?

(This article is edited and republished from a question I answered on a question and answer site. I chose to start with this as my first post in this site because unforgiveness is a major factor in pain.)

Four Issues

There are four issues here, in your question; so I want to address them separately.

  1. The thing you did that you feel terrible about.
  2. Your view of yourself.
  3. The attack on your mind.
  4. Forgiveness.

What You Did That You Feel Terrible About.

Usually, when someone feels terrible about something they did, it is because they recognize the affect, whether indirectly or directly; that their actions have had on others.

So I have to congratulate you, because in the world we currently live in, most people are so selfish and self-centered, that they don’t care about how their actions affect others.


Most people these days, feel justified in looking out only for themselves, and as far as everyone else is concerned, it’s “Oh, well. That’s their problem, or “ That’s their tough luck.” The fact that you seem to have a conscious and moral compass is praiseworthy.

In reality, I don’t really think what you did is the issue, unless it was something illegal because…

Romans 3:23 For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;

The real issue you need to search yourself about is WHY. Why did you do what you did that you probably knew would have a devastating effect on others; and what would motivate you to ignore their feelings and only focus on your own.

Your View Of Yourself.

In spite of that, you said that you know you are not a bad person. The insinuation that comes with that statement, is that only a bad person does bad or hurtful things. Not true.

Romans 3:10 As the Scriptures say: “There is no one who is righteous,
11  no one who is wise or who worships God.
12 All have turned away from God; they have all gone wrong; no one does what is right, not even one.

Psalm 14:1 Fools say to themselves, “There is no God!” They are all corrupt, and they have done terrible things; there is no one who does what is right.
2 The Lord looks down from heaven at us humans to see if there are any who are wise, any who worship him.
3 But they have all gone wrong; they are all equally bad. Not one of them does what is right, not a single one.

Psalm 53:1 Fools say to themselves, “There is no God.” They are all corrupt, and they have done terrible things; there is no one who does what is right.
2 God looks down from heaven at people to see if there are any who are wise, any who worship him.
3 But they have all turned away; they are all equally bad. Not one of them does what is right, not a single one.

Falling Short

The reason that this was stated in 3 separate scriptures was to emphasize the point that man’s righteousness is nothing. It’s foolishness, self-righteous and worthless.

Therefore, all of us fall short. All of us mess up, and hopefully, all of us learn from our mistakes and move on, forward and upward. Beating yourself up over it is a total waste of time.

don't beat yourself up in your subconscious mind.

What Can You Do?

What you should be doing is asking yourself if there is something you can do to change the situation for the better. Perhaps a heartfelt letter of apology, explaining whatever madness possessed you at the time when you put yourself above someone else to their detriment.

It’s not wrong to put yourself first, as long as you are considering others. It is only wrong if it is motivated by selfishness and greed. You may have been responding to an old trigger from your past; in which case, I suggest meditation so you can retrain your subconscious mind into living in the present with the future in focus.

In other words, try to find some way to give back, even if it’s not to the person(s) affected by your former actions. Sometimes when people are offended, they are not open to any form of communication from the offender, even if it is helpful and loving. You can’t control their reaction, but you can control your actions by finding opportunities to give back.

The Attack On Your Subconscious Mind.

The attack comes from the enemy of man, who is well versed on your triggers. He knows your past so it is easy to click the virtual computer of your mind into opening up an old wound or memory that triggers a certain response.

How You Can Fight Back

This is why meditation, a form of prayer is so important and valuable. It allows you to reprogram your subconscious mind, which is the dominant force behind all of your actions.

Whether you realize it or not, your subconscious mind runs the show. Over 80% of our mind’s functions are originating in our subconscious mind, which dictates to our conscious mind – where we think we have control.

In other words, the conscious mind is where we think we are really in charge. It’s a deception.

Take Control

Our subconscious mind, if left unchecked and to its own devices, will keep us living in the past. It operates as a stereo system on repeat; the same tracks on the programmed disks of our childhood keep playing over and over until you change the disk. You can do this by programming your own message disks with whatever you choose.

To clarify, the subconscious mind is like an old library card catalog that has a record of everything. It houses all (the old, negative) memories, and learned patterns and behaviors of our past experiences or upbringing (programming) and pulls them out at the first opportunity to hinder our progress towards our dreams or highest aspirations.

If anyone recalls, an old system like that does not update. So the library had to spend countless hours to reorganize their information into the new system (of thinking) and update it.

Confront The Situation

Likewise, that information is never 100% accurate. The stories in those memories are constantly being altered by filters based on our changing beliefs.

We may hold an idea about a situation from our perception of what happened, and that perception could be completely opposite of the way someone else involved may see it. And remember, our perceptions about something are always affected by the age and mindset in which we observed it.

That is why it isn’t always accurate. Our perspective doesn’t match actual reality. It’s totally one-sided. It’s just the view from our individual corner of the world, our personal reality; and does not encompass all factors and participants’ perspective of an incident or situation.

Therefore, it behooves us to confront both ourselves, and the situation or person we think we have offended. That is why we have to know our Why. Once we understand that, we can deal with the real and hidden issue that caused a self-centered reaction as opposed to a well thought out response.

That is to say, this is is why you must choose to take control, and not allow your subconscious to run amuck. We have to tell our subconscious what we choose to believe. By doing so, you eliminate what others have taught you to believe. You control all of this through meditation.


In summary, you may have to meditate to just to forgive yourself, because that is the first thing you must do to deal with the situation. When you fail to do so, you allow that hurt to emotionally lock in your mind, which then manifests as pain in your body in some form.

So remember what I said about finding a way to give back? Well the first person you must demonstrate that kindness to is yourself. The key to understanding forgiveness is that you “Give for.” The active word is reversed.

Reverse The Curse

Therefore, you give for the purpose of freeing and blessing yourself first, and then others. There is power in giving, thus there is power in forgiving. Both allows the cheerful giver to receive and be bountifully blessed in return, and amplifies their ability to be a blessing to others.

It frees all parties from the hurt of the situation, and allows the opportunity to start over. And we all need a second chance, right? In fact, according to the scriptures above…several second chances.

In conclusion, mistakes are life’s lessons meant to educate us, so that we can do better and be better. Not perfect, mind you, but better. Give yourself a break. Forgive yourself, and don’t be afraid to ask for the same.


http://blueletterbible.org for all scripture verses

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